~ The Toolshed ~

[Dreamy]

@Mustang67 oh number 4 hits so hard for me. I'm reminded that things I've done were done while I was in survival mode and that I did what I had to do in order to make it through. But it still hurts so much. Little by little I'm slowly learning to forgive myself. 

[DownMoreThanUp]

@Mustang67 True my friend. Overcoming is better than perishing.

[Mustang67]

@Dreamy yeah, I really struggle with that as well. But my mission is to educate my daughter on things that I didn't learn as a child, because of my environment. So I am making sure she is aware. But I find now, they actually teach things like having boundaries etc at school. But she knows that I am always here for her no matter what. And I am showing her what it feels like to be loved unconditionally. 

[PeppyPatti]

Yes. I have many regrets. 
shall we get a garbage bag and chuck them all in there and throw them in the sea ? 

iv lived in survival mode for years 

we have regrets 

how do we do this ?? 

@Dreamy @Jynx @Mustang67 @DownMoreThanUp @REDLINEZ750 

[Dreamy]

@Mustang67 sounds like you are doing an amazing job with your daughter. It's great that schools do educate kids now on many different things including boundaries. You should be so proud of yourself sweet for how far you've come ❤️

[PeppyPatti]

Yeas @Mustang67 

I feel the lives my sons have had is about being a scapegoat. 

I can’t touch it. 
I want to run away from it 

[Mustang67]

@PeppyPatti it would be so awesome if we could all just put our regrets in the garbage and throw them away.

When at therapy, when they ask can they help, I always respond to take away mmt memories. As that is where the pain lies. And thanks to CPTSD,  I get to relive it over and over.

[Dreamy]

@PeppyPatti i still live in survival mode in many ways. There's definitely many regrets and it sucks to sit with them.  We can't change the past but we can make the future brighter and better. And that's what we are doing here, we are constantly learning, finding out how to better ourselves, how to love ourselves and how to move forward so that we make a better life for ourselves. 

Sending you hugs my sweet, you're beautiful and amazing never forget that ❤️

[Mustang67]

@Dreamy aww thank you. She was going through a dark place herself a couple of years back, and I took her to a hotel for the weekend where I made her in charge of all the decisions. And if course I used this time to be frank with her and to try and find out what was going on.

The next week my ex messaged me wanting to know what I did, as he could see a positive change in her. 

[Mustang67]

@PeppyPatti it can be very hard to deal with. My thoughts are with you.