The joy of a messy house is I can’t suicide till it’s clean.

[Former-Member]

They are a little, thanks @TAB. 

[TAB]

Well thats something @Former-Member 😀 when I felt like that it went away after a time. Either something good well externally happened like a call or txts from someone or found a different perspective/did something different like going for walks or re revisiting good memories or smiling at the bad stuff .. letting go

[Shaz51]

Ohhhhhhh @Former-Member, here you are my wonderful friend ,

Happy birthday my friend xoxo

[Appleblossom]

Funny that @Former-Member 

I used the "I cant  ... until ... taxes done and oven is clean" for a long time.  It was a deferral mechanism and actually did keep me alive.

It became a bit confronting and so I was glad when oven broke and I had a hole in kitchen.  It was safer knowing there was no oven to clean ... that I might just ... etc etc

At the time, I had no body to talk about my suicidal ideation or proper mental health care. I was very isolated.

Now I have 2 desks that are a bit messy.  Well one is just a stash place and the other sorta tidied yesterday.

I have changed the dialogues in my head and it was really important that I was able to say it all out loud and be taken seriously and not fobbed off.

I love seeing you around, but also know its not good if times are tough.

Take Care Bella

[Former-Member]

CLEANS ALL THE THINGS!

[Shaz51]

Hello @Former-Member

[Former-Member]

Cleaning, just lots of cleaning.

[Shaz51]

I cleaned my house today too @Former-Member