My Mosaic

[Bow]

Thanks @Captain24 @Snowie 

It’s been a really long day. I had another really weird nights sleep and woke up feeling really groggy and tired. My SW visited first thing this morning. 
I went to my schema group but sent the facilitator a message that I needed to leave a tiny bit early and why. I didn’t really have much to give so wasn’t really keen to go at all, but I went. 
They had me draw a picture of a person on a big sheet of cardboard, it was our inner critic. We then spent a lot of time adding some physical feature of our inner critic and then filled in the critic with all the things it says to us. It was heaps confronting. Hard. To say it all out loud. And see it written down. Then we wrote on post it notes healthy adult responses. That was harder! Then they had use say …. ‘You tell me… I’m a failure, but … I’m trying my best’ and then we stuck the post it note over the written words. 

I left feeling fairly crummy. But had to pull myself together to go to the vet. 

I held Jaffa as he drifted off to sleep. Felt it as he let out a big sigh and he was gone. 
I was worried that I would feel nothing. But that was not necessary, I definitely felt it. 

RIP 🥺😭

 

[rav3n]

hey @Bow

ahh waking up groggy just sorta makes the rest of the day feel off sometimes doesn't it? but you still pushed through the day!!

sorry to hear about Jaffa, such a sweet photo of him. losing a pet is never easy. we're sitting with you and sending you hugs 💗

do you have a calm night planned? hope you're taking it easy tonight.

[Snowie]

Hi @Bow 

Firstly I am in awe of what you have gone through today. To get to your group in the first place this morning and then to work on your inner critic, I say that that takes a lot of strength and courage. No doubt it was confronting hon, the whole process would have been. I hope that they supported you whilst you went through it all. 

Then the hardest part was yet to come. I'm so glad you were able to hold him in your arms in his final moments, that he drifted off with you right there with him. 

No doubt there would be so many emotions running through you right now. Please know we are here for you hon, that you are not alone. You have been in my thoughts all day and continue into the night.

Such a difficult time for you. I hope your D is ok.

RIP Jaffa 💗💗

Such a lovely photo

[Bow]

Thanks @Snowie @rav3n  

i got in my pjs as soon as we got home. We picked up a woolies chicken and some nice ice cream on the way home too, so an easy dinner. Just on the couch watching tv now. I’ll probably go to bed early. I’m tired. We will bury him in the backyard tomorrow. 

im sad. He was a beautiful cat. So much energy. Loved a feather on a piece of string and was so darn quick to escape outside. 

[Snowie]

PJ's, an easy dinner and some ice cream sounds good @Bow 

So does an early night.

No doubt you are sad hon. In coming days I'm sure there will be many more emotions.

He sounds like he was such a big part of your family, and still will be. There must be lots of wonderful memories with him. They certainly do become a huge part of our families.

[Bow]

What did you get up to today @Snowie 

@Jynx  not around tonight?

[Snowie]

I cleaned the kitchen, washed/ironed and did some cooking @Bow It actually was satisfying when I was finished. Felt like I at least accomplished something.

There weren't many meals left in the freezer so I restocked some of it.

Have you got something nice planned for yourself for tomorrow? I know how hard the day will be with laying Jaffa to rest.

[rav3n]

easy dinner is the way to go tonight! hope you get some good rest and sleep too.

aw sounds like Jaffa was a lil cheeky too, what a beautiful boy. he's very lucky to have had you give him so much love 💗

also @Jynx has headed off already, just me tonight 😊

[Bow]

Sounds like you achieved lots today @Snowie  what kind of meals did you cook? 

tomorrow I have a dietitian appointment in the morning. Need to go get groceries after that and then not much else. Probably some more painting. 

[Snowie]

I cooked some fried rice, steak and some pad thai @Bow 

Over the next few days I will cook some more things too. I like cooking, it helps me calm down, relaxes me and a good distraction.

After such a full on day today it might be nice for tomorrow to be a bit easier for you. No doubt you deserve a quieter day. What sort of painting do you think you will do?